Control

Last night was crazy (but a good crazy). Lately I've been battling the need to control situations around me. I mean I just feel sometimes that if I can tell a person what to do that he/she will be better off you know? I hate typing this but let me be honest real quick: I sometimes feel that I am "smarter" than some people and that I know it all. WOOOOO back up uhh, I was/am SO SO SO wrong!! Little did I know how much I was making the situation worse =/. Duh me right lol.

Let me make it clear, it's ok to sometimes help people out, give them a push and good advise, but it is not ok to push them over the edge on top of a 30ft building is it? They don't want to die so they turn around and fight or beg you not to push them. That's were I am at right now, I need to learn not to push people over the edge and allow God to work with them. My intentions are good but that doesn't mean their right.

Letting go of the need to control situations around me is actually REALLY healthy. By letting go and letting God, I am freeing up more space for God to work in my life and freeing space for me to concentrate on more important things. It's a new aspect of freedom and a deeper level of trust we put in God and it feels good. Just think of situations right now that you need/try to control, even if their small situations but especially if they are big ones and LET GO!! I need not say more but to say this: LET GO AND LET GOD! In every situation.


***If you slip up and catch yourself being controlling again, dust yourself off pick yourself up repent and move forward***

Love lots and read more, have a great day!!!!

Discouraged

I'm beginning to feel discouraged but I will walk in wisdom and do as He has taught me. Things will go as planed as long as I stand firm on the word of God and continue to praise him for who he is. He is my provider, protector, Father, King, and so much more.

Don't get discouraged when things don't seem to be going your way, believe me you'll make it worse for yourself. I can so make it worse for myself today but I will refuse to let the enemy take my thoughts and happiness away from me. I will enjoy my day and live happy knowing that it is being taken care of.

That doesn't mean I should go do foolish things it means the exact opposite. I need to obey he word precisely so that his will can be done in my life.

Have a great day today peeps!!

Love lots and be blessed today.

Finally

I finally figured out how to add my flowers gadget lol so now you can start fallowing me and my words =0). I hope I can inspire you and give you hope cause there is so much more God wants for all of us if we just stay still, listen, and obey.

Anyway fallow away

Revenage

I've been reading the book of Ezekiel and I am so amazed. The first few chapters I didn't really think much but as I kept reading, (im on chapter 41 now), and I noticed something very profound. God will revenge for us, there is no need to try and do it yourself. ( I noticed more that but this message popped out the most)

The book of Ezekiel has a lot of death in it and God is constantly asking Ezekiel to give his people a message and Ezekiel always obeys (which is another message that I am amazed at). God destroys all his enemy's and punishes those who defile his name or word. He literally destroys people very vividly and in ways we don't see today, enough to bring me to my knees in reverential fear and in awe of him. He even punishes his people in Israel for not having faith and for worshiping idols. He does however bring his people back to him and makes a covenant of peace with them and tells them that they will have a new heart and spirit Jeremiah 36, 25-27. From there anyone who tries to attack his people are done!! I mean let's just say his fury and anger is outrageous!! Just look at Jeremiah 39, 1-7 (and that's just 1 of many).

You see God will protect us and fight off our enemy's for us. He will destroy them in ways we will never be able to do. It's far greater then any revenge we can think of so why not let him do it? Believe me his ways are a WHOLE lot better than ours. So let's not try to take revenge ourselves and let God take care of it. Even little things like flipping someone off cause he cut you off on the fwy lol or deliberately not washing the dishes because your husband or brother said they would do it last time and they didn't, even things like not going back to a store because a clerk was rude to you or not doing your job the way you know you should because you feel like your being taking advantage of. I think you get the drift.

I hope with all my heart that you will trust god with all your heart and believe with all your soul that God is your protector and He will revenge for your. Do keep in mind there will be times were can't see him taking care of you, you won't be able to notice it but just trust that he his because he his. I've come to learn that he doesn't always fill me in on his plan lol. It's OK though cause I can just go about my business and continue be productive knowing with out a shadow of a doubt that He is by my side fighting for me and protecting me. After all I am the daughter of the most high and he is my Father, of course he will take care of me =) and will it for you too.

Have lots of trust, Love lots, and give God thanks!!!


This song is so precious listen to the words and know that he is for you!!!!! Since he is for you who can be against you???? This song is so AMAZING and so is Kari Jobe!!! Take a listen:

Thankful

Today I woke up with a thankful heart. Thankful for all that I have learned and all that I have. I am not exactly were I want to be in life but that's OK because I know I will get there and even though I am not where I want to be in life I so seriously enjoy my life. I have my slip ups and frustrations but I try not to let it get to me by trusting in God and he honestly helps me through it.

I encourage you to be thankful for what you have in life and for the challenges you go through. Thankful that God loves you so much that he gave you everything you see around you and thankful for his help and guidance as we go through our trials because it's only then that we can grow into our true selves.

I pray for you and your hearts desires and ask for God to bless you beyond your control that the only way to handle all your blessings is to ask for God's help =).

Books

Gosh how I love reading books! Magazines are cool too but books are just so much more interesting to me. I just finished reading "The Battle Belongs To The Lord" written by Joyce Meyers and I highly reccomend it! Its so turthful and inspiring, it will change your life. I know it's change mine! Now im onto "Look Great, Feel Great, 12 Keys to Enojying a Healthy Life Now" and this is my 2nd time reading this one. The first time I read it I lost 30 lbs cause I was so deadicated! I've slipped up the last 2 years or so I decided to read it again and now im back on track to healthy body, mind, and sprit =D!

If you dont read I sugguest you start right away. It doesn't have to be a book, start small and work your way up, I promise you will enjoy every minute of it.

Novels are good books too, I love them. They take you away from your reality for a quick second and it's so much fun. Novels are great! I haven't read to many Bio's. Know of any good ones? Make sure you get some "self-help" books along the way, the right ones though. Make sure they are ones that are positive and that pretain to your needs. I always ask God before I purchase any books to make sure it's something I should be reading. If I have peace about reading it I will, if there is no peace then I'm not reading it. He allows me to read most of what I ask him anyway =P!


Have fun reading and read lots. What are some of the books you've read? I wanna know lol!! Any suggestions?

I do it unto God

Boy o boy am I a little fustrated right now, but you know what it's ok cause I will not allow my emotions to get the best of me. I do things unto God and he is my protector and provider. He is the one who grants me supernatural favor and opens doors no man can shut and cloeses doors no man can open. This battle belongs to the God =D!

Good Morning

Its a beautiful day today in Southern California! I woke up really tired but right after a hot cup of coffee in my beautiful Breakfest At Tiffany's mug and a hot shower I was ready for my day!! On my way to work I listened to a teaching from Joyce Meyers about learning the devils stragadies and I gotta tell ya its some powerful stuff!! It made me think about that way I act and how much more discipline I need. Learning the devils stradiges is a very powerful tool for us because there are somethings I do that allow him to come in and use me =/ SO NOT IDEAL. It has to do with me acting on my feelings. When I act on my feelings I allow the devil into my life and he just srews everything up. I have to learn how to be able to feel a negative emotion but not act on it. Joyce Meyers says, and I love, " We can not help how we feel but we can certainly help how we act". Boy do I have some growing up to do!!!!! It isn't gonna be easy I can tell you that much but as long as I get on my knees and pray until I am able to conquer my negative feelings I slam the door shut in the devils face. WOOHOO now im feeling confidante!

So here's to you devil: GOD WILL FIGHT THIS BATTLE FOR ME AND I WILL OBEY HIM!!

PS: I couldn't find a pic of a Tiffany's mug so I put a pink one ;)

Leaving the battle for God

I truly now know and understand what it means when they say, "The battle belongs to the Lord"! I'm sure I'll continue to get tested but today I experienced it and I got blessed like CRAZY because of it. For namesake and the piracy of people and places I cannot give details but I didn't complain or whine about anything today. Sure negative thoughts came and I wanted to complain and whine but I ignored those thoughts and kept telling myself, "I am doing this unto you Lord, I am doing this unto you" and woohoo a blessing fell on my lap!!

God is so amazing when we stick to what He requires of us no matter how hard we have to fight our mind, emotions, feelings, or whatever, we must always listen and obey his word. I did and wow was I blessed =D. I will continue to do my best and make sure I become an expert at leaving the battle for God!! I hope you do too!

Ezekiel chapter 4

I just finished reading Ezekiel chapter 4 and it blessed my heart. God was giving Ezekiel some crazy insturctions to do in regards to Israel and Judah but Ezekeil did them and had complete faith. I thought WOW he did'nt even question God, what a great servent, I was SO wrong! Ezekiel 4:14,15 clearly proved me wrong. God wanted Ezekiel to eat human dung but he didn't want to since he hadn't in the past, not even any animal let alone human. In verse 15 God allowed him not to eat human dung but gave him other instructions. What's my point? I don't know about you but I always thought that questioning God was a big nono. I mean I thought it was the biggest sin, but here I clearly see that its not! If we were to question God, He might give us the same instructions or direction but maybe he won't as he didn't in Ezekiel's case. So very profound to me I hope it is for you too.

Let's all be as obiendient as Ezekiel no matter how crazy it may sound, just read chapter 4 and you will understand what I mean lol, but Ezekiel obeyed God and God blessed Him for it. Let us all get out of our comfort zone and do as God commands and if we have it ask God why or ask if we can do it another way then ask away. If He tells us no then let's obey anyways and if He tell us yes and gives us other instructions then let's obey in that too =)

The love for discipline and obediance

Its been awhile since I've blogged hasn't it!! Did you miss my words =0)? So much has happened since I last blogged, which has been over a month, YIKES.

I've grown so much in my walk with God and have a bigger love for discipline and obedience! God loves those he disciplines and I gotta say he has a HUGE love for me and has a HUGE love for us all. He does not discipline to hurt us put to protect us, equip us, adjust make our life's easier. From experience I know it can be tough to obey when we don't "feel" like it but we have too. I just learned this by Joyce Meyers a few weeks ago, but I learned that a good way to help us obey God when our feelings and emotions get in the way is to talk yourself through it. Tell yourself, "I don't feel like doing this but I am" or "I really don't want to but I will" or even "This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever said or done but I will do it and say it". This has really helped me and I know it will help you. To obey God we have to trust Him, believe me he has nothing but good plans for you anyways, ready Jeremiah 29:11. God had me start obeying Him in the little things so I can get used to Him and everyday I noticed my self progressing in His obedience with bigger things. I would start by asking Him little things like what to wear and now its gotten to were I am obeying Him in much more bigger things like shutting my mouth when I just want to make a point and give my opinions. Disobedience can be an addiction, we all have to start somewhere and take it a day at a time and progressing.

Discipline and obedience has really helped me and to be honest I truly feel like I am a child of a King, literally. I feel like I am really His daughter and this has been done just by continual obedience to his every word. I am not perfect and I have a lot to work on and God has a lot more to fix in my life but I am on the right track and I truly truly am so humbled by it.

I hope you can experience this with me, especially those who are father less as I am, or has an absent father that doesn't listen, is a drunk, on drugs, abusive, violent, never there, caring but doesn't understand, a father that never encourages or talks to you. God can fill whatever empty part of your heart that your biological father has created, yes even those hearts that are completely empty and dry.

I BEG you to get closer to God, hear His heart and you too will so seriously feel the joy in knowing you are a child of the King, a beautiful princess and/or a warrior prince, you will not just know it but feel it and act it. God is waiting to talk to you, guide you, love you, discipline you, bless you, and so much more. Let him in I promise with all my heart you will live the life you have always dreamt of and more.

Thank You!!

In the mist of my world I am evolving to be a self disciplined child of God. He is SO amazing to me its kinda ridiculous. =)

To God:

I love you so much! Thank you for everything that you have done for me. Thank you for knowing me better than I know my self and for sticking up to me when I was too weak to do it my self. Thank you for protecting me and thank you for blessing me. Please don't ever stop disciplining me because I refuse to be any where else but in your will.

I love you until the end of time....

Sick

I feel so sick to my stomach today =(! I got a lot on my mind and I think that's what's making feel ill. When I say I got a lot on my mind I mean a whole lot. Some things I don't need to be concerned about and some things I need to have complete faith in. It's like I know what I need to do but the thought of jumping into the unknown is scary and it's making me sick to my stomach. The only word that comes to me is God, which makes sense as he is the only one that can see me through this. The thought of knowing I can turn to Him and trust Him with my life gives me peace and comfort.

Faith Faith Faith Faith we all gotta have Faith. I must have faith today and give all my worries to Him, all my heartaches, stomachaches, and negativity to Him and Him alone. His promise will stand true today as it has always been, Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." and Hebrews 13:5 "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." It's a battlefield of the mind and it's hard but SO WORTH IT!!

Fight the enemy off by all means and live the life you know you deserve today!!

Regrets

So I've been in school for quite some time. I slacked off big time after high school due to too much partying and laziness. Now I'm here at 25 years of age with a research paper due in a week and lots of classes in the years to come. I don't regret the partying I did, sure I wish my path then would have been different but it wasn't it and there is great reason for it, to tell you the truth I honestly don't regret it any of it. I meet lots of positive people in my past life and learned lots of valuable lessons that no one can teach you, lessons we have to learn from experience. I am in the perfect place in my life right now, I'm still in school but its OK. I do not have to prove to anyone that I can finish or that I can get good grades etc. I simply go to school to learn, grow, and experience. No matter what age you are or how long you have procrastinated go do what you have longed to do. It's your path and now is the time to get up and walk straight along the road less travel. Don't ever regret anything that has happened in your life, it happened for a reason, we all just gotta LEARN from what we experience and choose our paths and decisions wisely. Just because I say I do not regret my past does not mean I would recommend some of the things that I have done or said to anyone so they do can too "learn" the same lessons I learned. We all have our own paths and it's up to us to discover them.

Don't regret your past and give positive advise to those who ask and lead by example to those who don't ask.

I guess if I had to choose between happiness and money it would be happieness! The irony of it all is that I am a responsible person and need to pay my bills. I am stuck right now but I will dig myself a hole and get out because I see a bright light at the end of the tunnel =). Giving up is not an option and neither is settleing for unhappiness. I feel it in my heart that nothing but goodness in my future with financial stablity and happiness. I have faith in God and I know he is by my side, protecting me, loving me, and encourging me to fallow him cause only then will I be able to fully see my dreams come ture in its entireity.

I CAN NOT WAIT TO FULLY EXPRESS MYSELF AND CREATE

Movies

I love movies! The art of producing them to is very magical. Its like I am at two places at once. One can get so captivated by the emotion and scenary of the movie that you do nothing but fall in love with the characters and at times compare their lives to yours, which can be so positive. I have been with Netflix for about 2 years now and I absolutly adore it! Its was a complete dream when I sgined up! Not only can I rent up to 3 movies and a cheap price but I can also preview movies online and also watch them on my wonderful Dell laptop. I have to admit, some moives are very fake and not real at all. They jump too far over the line of turth and lose my interest quickly. I guess what I want to say is THANK YOU. Thank you to everyone involved in film making, when I say everyone I mean everyone =)

Girls

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!! OH GIRLS GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!! I gotta say I love my girls!! I love hanging out with them, talking to them, shopping with them, laughing with them, and just HAVING FUN with them!!!!!!! Ladies if you don't have any female friend you NEED some right away!! We are so much fun when we are all together!!!

Money

So recently a lot of unexpected finances have been fallowing me like balloons that won't float up or pop. A couple thousand here a few hundred there its really stressful at times 8-). Right when we (me and my boyfriend) have a lump some of money saved up something always comes up and it vanishes out of our bank accounts: so not ideal! Good thing is i just cleared up my credit and paid off some fines, we only have about $700 left or so after 03/31 to check off then we can start saving for Jesse to get a car. After we will save to get a place. It seems like we will never get our own place at the rate we are going but i know we will, i just gotta have patience. One step at a time, its not like we aren't taking care of things. This past check i spent like crazy cause I was so stressed at saving then paying off a bill or having an unexpected expense so I said fuck it I'm spending :---). Not the smartest thing to do right? Ya i know, we will start saving again 04/15. I would say 03/31 but i got my car, phone, and insurance, which calculates to $1,016. With all this said I realized the other day that its life that is important not money. I enjoy life and what it has to offer regardless of my financial status and we all have to remember that. I only have a couple hundred dollars to my name at the moment but i choose to be happy, live my life, and enjoy my precious moments.

Family

I had a fun filled day with my family today! it was, my boyfriend, my mom, 2 brothers their wife's,and my niece. We all went to my moms house and she mad Puerto Rican caldo soup which is so very delicious. It was very fulfilling to be around them as they are literally the only family i have out here in Cali and considering I live about 30-60 minutes away from all of them so I don't see them as much. I felt kinda sad to leave cause I know it will probably be weeks before i see them again but i know they are all doing well and they all have love in their lives so i am happy for that!

Love the family you got and don't be afraid to allow friends into your circle of love as they can easily fall into your own little family of love =)

Change

This week has been crazy and i think its because its time for change. It seems as if my body and soul knows it has a road to fallow and that road is going straight yet im steering to the left. Its a leap in the unknown and that's what scares me, i know it will be for the best because God will be with me but somehow i am stuck. I've been doing a lot of thinking and i came to a conclusion, no more being afraid and time to take action. I must do my part to fulfill my dreams and create the world I long for. Every single step counts and i will be proud of even the slightest change I do at becoming a better me. Being a better me brings out the best in you. I can not fully love others until i love myself and its hard to fully love myself if I am not where I know i need to be. As of right now I fully love myself as I know I will continue to fight through my cracked heart and change where I know i need to in every moment that passes and I plan to keep it this way.

Walking Far

There are some things that are clear and some things that I have to prowl through, pound on and love with. I'm reading a very and when I say very i mean very interesting book that keeps me refreshed and one. I know now that my road is and always has been mine. Mine to love give learn grow live laugh work listen practice teach believe do allow fulfill fallow lead rest clean like adore keep free help accomplish push...and that's not even a glimpse